It can be so intimidating to just walk up to that cute girl and start up a conversation. Making eye contact with that guy that just walked in could send you into a panic.
When someone you see or have just met is stunning it is natural to be a little nervous starting a conversation. But being completely impaired, whether that means babbling incoherently or simply running in the opposite direction, is a problem.
There are many people who lack the confidence they need to communicate with the opposite sex.
However, talking to the opposite sex does not have to be intimidating and scary. Learning to be more comfortable around girls or guys will definitely help you in forming stronger relationships. It will also help improve the romantic side of relationships – your dating life.
There are many different, easy ways that you can be confident around members of the opposite sex—here are just a few to start with!
- Be Clean. This might seem like a strange place to start. However, being clean can pretty much make it or break it in your exchanges with people in general. This tip has as much to do with self-confidence as it does first impressions. If you haven’t washed your hair in a couple of days, your face is a little dirty, and you clearly haven’t washed your clothes in a while, you are immediately not going to feel as confident and you are probably going to immediately be judged by whoever you are talking to. Many people will loose confidence pretty quickly if they can tell they are being judged, so avoid this by always showing up clean—then you will be sure to make a great first impression!
- Good hair. We have all had bad hair days. Those are the worst because even if we have our favorite outfit on, we won’t feel as confident without the hair to match it. When you know you are going to be around people, especially people you have never met, be sure to give yourself a little extra time to fix your hair. Most bad hair days happen because we get in a rush. This can be avoided with a little planning. You will feel more confident if your hair is looking good, so make sure to plan ahead!
- Dress to impress. Not only will a good outfit make a great first impression, but it will also shoot your self-confidence through the roof! When you are feeling like you don’t look very good, or if you are uncomfortable with your outfit, your will be less likely to engage in conversations confidently—especially with the opposite sex. So be sure to avoid this problem by wearing something that you can be comfortable and confident in! (Read: 9 Trendy Tips in Cool Weather Clothing for Women)
- Smell nice. It is a proven fact that the majority of people respond better to people that have an appealing scent. If you don’t have a favorite perfume or cologne, it will be worth your time to search for one. Don’t just settle for that body spray your aunt got your for Christmas one year—go out and find your scent. You will feel confident every time you spray it on because you will know it is unique to you. Other people will be sure to notice as well, so it is definitely worth it!
- Smile. This is a great, and maybe obvious, trick. Smiling of course gives a great first impression to other people—it will make them think you are confident even if you are not. However, smiling can also trick yourself. If you are feeling really insecure, just smile for a while and you will actually start to feel happier. You will boost other’s people’s confidence in you while boosting your own confidence!
- Be genuine. One of the best ways to be confident around others is to be yourself. This can seem tricky because you might not think that you are cool enough or funny enough or interesting enough to be you. However, you will feel the most confident and secure when you are being true to yourself. Also, other people really do respect a genuine person more than a fake person—and people can definitely tell when you’re faking it. Just remember that the people you want to surround yourself with are people that genuinely like you for you—so do not be afraid to be yourself.
- Listen well. One of the qualities that most people value in their friends is listening. This is a great way to boost your confidence around the opposite sex because the better you listen, the more they will put their confidence in you. The more confidence other people have in you, the more likely you will have confidence in yourself! It also can give you a chance to really assess a situation and get to know people better. Ultimately, listening well to others will help your confidence and build trust with others.
- Have a wing-man. This might seem silly, but having one of your best friends around when you are trying to talk to a member of the opposite sex can be exactly what you need to boost your confidence. A wing-man (or wing-woman) is great to have around because you always have someone on your side. Also, the security you feel around that person will definitely be transferred to other people. If you don’t have a wing-man, find one—it will be sure to boost your self-confidence.
- Have a good sense of humor. People like people that are funny. There is a level of comfort when you are around someone that has a good joke to tell or just has a good sense of humor. Sometimes when we are not feeling confident we tend to become very quiet, which could be seen as standoff-ish. In order to avoid this, try to have a good sense of humor when you are around the opposite sex. This will make them feel more comfortable around you which will make you more confident to be around them—it’s a win-win! (Read: Laughter is the Best Medicine – 8 Health Benefits of Humor)
- Remember they are probably insecure too. Most people are probably experiencing the same type of anxiety you are when it comes to being around the opposite sex. This should make you feel a little better because at least you are not alone! Remember that you are all on common ground. Once you decide to be active in your self-confidence, you can help others do the same (which will definitely boost your own confidence even more). People are not as scary as they seem, especially when you realize that they are probably just as intimidated by you as you are by them. Be confident. You have nothing to worry about!