Dealing with an affair is tough and it can put stress on many other areas of your life, causing pain and reeking havoc on your mental and emotional well being. The only way to remove that stress is to find out for sure whether or not your wife is actually cheating.
Now you could go out an hire a private detective, but that could cost thousands of dollars. In today’s world the most cost efficient way to find out for sure if your wife is having an affair is with software.
If you really want to regain your sanity and stop worrying about your wife’s infidelity, you need to know for sure what is going on. Waiting and hoping that things are not what they seem will only prolong your pain and the inevitable truth. Wouldn’t it be great to find out that she is not really cheating and that you were just seeing things that weren’t there? Wouldn’t that allow your relationship to move forward and keep you from stressing over something that just isn’t real?
You need to ask yourself what is more important, your health and well being or a little bit of money. The answer is always your health.
Invest in your well being today. You won’t regret it!
Look for These Signs If Your Are Unsure
Marriage is not easy. Even the couples who love each other the most will face arguments, stresses, life changes, and many other difficulties.
Most issues, however, can be worked through if both partners are committed to the marriage and willing to work on their relationship.
One issue that many can’t get past, though, is infidelity. While infidelity is not always a “kiss of death” for marriages, it can do some very serious damage to the trust and love shared between a couple.
Even suspecting that your wife may be cheating can cause serious problems between the two of you. Just be sure your suspicions can be confirmed before you accuse her, or else you may create a problem that wasn’t there to begin with.
While the best way to find out the truth is to confront your wife, there are some tell-tale signs that tend to indicate an affair is going on behind your back.
- Pulling away. You might think that a cheating wife would be likely to pull away from your affections and detach herself from you. While this is sometimes the case, many cheating wives will actually do the opposite and will pay you more attention and affection whilst cheating as a way to alleviate guilt.
Rather than looking at how your wife treats you, consider how she treats your friends and family members. If she used to call your mom on the phone but has recently cut off contact, or if she’s stopped planning get-togethers with your best friend and his wife, an affair is a real possibility.
Cheaters don’t like to be around people who care about you, as these people serve to increase their guilt and confusion and also offer a reminder of the many people who would be hurt if the truth of the infidelity came out. Furthermore, many cheating wives worry that your close friends and family members will be able to tell something is amiss even if you can’t.
- Becoming a cell-phone addict. Is your wife constantly getting phone calls? If this has always been the case, you may be able to disregard this cheating sign. But if the phone calls have greatly increased all of a sudden, and if your wife excuses herself to take them in private, cheating is a definite possibility.
Bear in mind, however, that your wife may communicate with her lover through secret texts or via the computer as well. If these behaviors have increased and your wife is being sneaky about them, she could have something going on the side.
- Going out with “the girls”. If your wife has recently turned into a “social butterfly,” and especially if she was more of a homebody before, she could be sneaking out to spend time with her lover. Women in happy, healthy marriages should and often do have friendships outside of the marriage. However, in a healthy marriage these relationships always take a backseat to her relationship with you.
If nights out “with the girls” have suddenly taken top priority, and if your wife dodges questions about who she’s seeing and where they’re going, you may have something to worry about. Be especially wary if her story changes or if you are unable to get into contact with your wife during her outings.
- Nagging and nit-picking. Does it seem like your wife is constantly nagging at you? If she is nagging about big, important things you shouldn’t need to worry. But if her nagging has turned to nit-picking and you can’t seem to do anything right, she could be having an affair.
Women who are cheating often feel a need to justify their unfaithful behaviors and, as a result, will seek to find fault in anything and everything you do. A woman who used to find your little idiosyncrasies endearing but who now rolls her eyes in disgust and launches into a tirade against them could be a woman who is finding love (or fulfilling lust) elsewhere.
- Primping and preening. Let’s face it guys—after a few years of marriage, most women will let themselves go, at least a little bit. As your wife gets more comfortable with you, it’s normal for her to go a little longer in between hair cuts or to lounge in her pajama bottoms all day.
While you might get excited if your wife suddenly starts exercising, coloring her hair, or dressing better, these behaviors could indicate the presence of a new love interest. It’s normal for women to want to look their best in the early stages of a relationship, so it makes sense for a cheating wife to suddenly take a new interest in her appearance.
It could just be that your wife wants to rekindle the flame between the two of you and is trying her best to make herself more attractive. But more often than not, a change in appearance and grooming habits indicates something is amiss.
- New best friend. If your wife can’t stop talking about “Kathy” from work or her new friend “Jill” who she met at the gym and, worse yet, if she’s going out with this new person on a regular basis, it might just be more likely that she’s actually hanging out with a Kurt or a Jim!
Women have a desire to talk about what they’re doing, even if it’s a secret, and inventing a new female friend gives them a way to do that, as well as a convenient alibi for escaping on trysts with their new lovers. Insist on meeting this new friend, and if your wife makes excuses as to why you can’t then it’s probably time to start worrying.
- Strange smells. When you live with someone for a long time, you get used to their special unique scent. If that unique smell is slowly morphing into something different, however, your wife has either developed some new hygiene habits or she may be having an affair.
If she’s suddenly started smelling like men’s cologne, and it’s not yours, a lover is likely. Furthermore, if she comes home reeking of smoke and doesn’t smoke herself, or if you can detect alcohol on her breath when she claims she was working late or doing some other activity that shouldn’t have involved drinking, something’s not right.
- Changes in sexual behavior. If your wife suddenly starts wanting more sex from you than ever before, you might feel like the luckiest man in the world. Don’t be so quick to count your blessings however. Any change in sexual behavior is often a big red flag that your wife is having an affair.
She could be requesting more sex from you as a way to alleviate her own guilt. Or it could be that she’s having an emotional affair and using you as a way to satisfy her unfulfilled lust for someone else. Conversely, if you had a healthy sexual relationship in the past but your love life has suddenly gone kaput, this could mean that she’s finding what she needs elsewhere.
None of these signs provide a surefire way to tell if your wife is cheating, and you shouldn’t become paranoid right off the bat. However, if you do happen to notice some or all of these things, it might be a good idea to talk about your relationship and make sure everything is going ok. And if something is wrong then you need to figure out whether or not the marriage is worth fighting for (Read: 10 Steps to Saving a Broken Marriage).